One of the first questions new students are asked when arriving at 天美视频 is 鈥淗ow did you get here?鈥� or, to put it another way, 鈥淲hat is your story?鈥澛營t鈥檚 such a rare place鈥攗nlike any other in the world (believe me, I鈥檝e looked). Rarely is the path to its doorsteps without some adventure or calling. My story is no different.
Honestly, when I first began telling my story I started too recently. I began with the years spent fighting against the yearning bubbling up in my heart, or with the phone call to Rachael Clinton deferring my enrollment for a year.
The real answer, however, is that it started with a handshake.
It was 2009 and I had a career. I was twenty-six years old, doing what I thought was my dream鈥攃oaching and teaching at a prestigious high school in my hometown.聽One afternoon a fellow coach invited a local therapist to come speak to volunteers soon headed to Belize to work with local students. The therapist鈥檚 name was Stephen James鈥攁 graduate of 天美视频.
It was a moment I鈥檒l never forget. We were being introduced for the first time, and I did what I always did in such situations鈥擨 went in aggressively to powerfully shake his hand. Just like my grandfather taught me: look him in the eye and shake firmly.
On this occasion, however, I got a very different response than I was used to. Stephen pulled back and said, 鈥淲hoa man, what are you trying to prove?鈥�
Those eight words stopped me in my tracks.
It may seem silly, but Stephen鈥檚 response rocked the very core of who I believed myself to be at the time. It鈥檚 hard for me to fully explain even now, years later, but unbeknownst to him, Stephen spoke to a longing in my soul鈥攁 piece of myself that knew I wasn鈥檛 who I was meant to be.
His words called out to a lonely heart, and I haven鈥檛 been the same since.
I was thinking about this story recently while watching the movie Fury. In it Shia LaBeouf鈥檚 character quotes Isaiah 6:8: 鈥淭hen I heard the voice聽of the Lord saying, 鈥榃hom shall I send?聽And who will go for us?鈥� And I said, 鈥楬ere am I.聽Send me!鈥欌��
I believe that day with Stephen six years ago was the moment God called out to me, 鈥淲ill you be sent? Will you go for us?鈥� It was the moment when I was forever ruined for normal work and a simple life. Even if I didn鈥檛 realize it at the time鈥攁 restlessness had been raised within me. One I would never again be able to ignore.
It took four years, a failed business school experiment, and a lot of fear before I was finally ready to be sent. But honestly, I don鈥檛 think any of that really matters. Whether it took four years or forty, the point isn鈥檛 when we go, but simply that we go. I had to fight and claw and scream and ask God to send me anywhere else, but eventually I went.
It鈥檚 funny, sometimes I want to blame Stephen or God for getting me into this mess. For pushing me beyond the simple life I thought I desired. The truth is, God didn鈥檛 make me do anything. He simply used a man to call into the truth of who I am created to be and waited for me to answer.
I鈥檇 like to say I鈥檓 glad every day that I answered, but that would be a lie. Some days I鈥檓 angry for all that my decisions have cost me鈥攆or what I鈥檝e left behind. Other days I cry watching cheesy Today Show stories and wonder what the hell I鈥檓 doing here. In the end, I guess the point is simply that I鈥檓 here.
I鈥檓 here, Lord. Send me.